Friday, July 15, 2005

Guilty

One of my favorite shows this past season was Showdogs Moms and Dads. It was great. A perfect reality show paring of comedy and desperation that makes the viewer feel just a little more together, a superiority boost that everyone needs at 10pm on a weekday. I laughed, sighed, and tsked the whole while, telling my boyfriend that if I ever get like that to lock me up because those people are goners. I know that I am in the deep end of the animal loving pool. C'mon I tear up everytime I see a person with a service dog. It is the selflessness, the unconditional love, it gets me every time. But, do I fit into the category of animal enthusiast or overly obsessive pet owner?
I do not whip out pictures for strangers, but if you ask, hey, I happen to have nine 3x2s right here. I talk to my pets, and sometimes even tell long drawn out stories about my day, which they probably don't understand. I can imagine Skip asking Buster, "What the hell is a fax!" I draw the line at dressing them because let's face it, that is teetering on the edge of sanity. Some folks decorate their entire homes around themes, like Rhodesian Ridgebacks, or Siamese cats. Okay, I do that too. When out shopping, I look for rabbit things to buy. Blessedly, I have not found a store exclusively for rabbits yet, selling t-shirts, mugs, and bumper stickers. Not that I would ever put a bumper sticker on my car. My dad instilled in me a deep respect for my car, and I just don't think I could do that. Years ago, I stuck an ASU Alumni sticker in my darkly tinted rear window as a kind of rebellion against the system. You couldn't even see that sticker, but I knew it was there, and I felt guilty about it the whole time. I couldn't sell that car fast enough.
I take care of my pets, but will never refer to myself as their mother. Instead I make up silly variations on the letter B or S. Buster is BB, Busty, Bus, Bdiddly, Bun, Bman, BBee, just "B" or Bojangles, and Skip is Skip-bo, SB, Skippy, Skipili dippili do, Skipster, Skipsky, Sippy, Sulu.
They do not sleep with me (but oh! if they would!). They have their own room, and they eat better than I do. I buy them fresh veggies 1-2 times a week, washing, cutting, and bagging veggies, which I feed them twice a day. They also get treats, hay, pellets, and veggies, faux lambskin mats, grass mats, old paper towel rolls, toilet paper rolls, bath mats, pop boxes, etc.
Buster even loves to groom me, licking my face, ear, arm, any exposed skin, so I can't even say that I don't kiss them. I started this website, hmm, I think I smell something, coffee, maybe? Is it time I was locked away with those Showdog parents? But who would take care of my babies?!

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